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LADYMOI WEEK CONTINUES AFTER THIS WORD FROM APPLE COMPUTERS, NOW IN BLUEBERRY AND BOTTLE BLONDE

The LadyMOI stalkerfan site continues to gain accolades and attention, especially from law enforcement officials. In response, here’s some words from the owner of the server.

I am the administrator for the entire Maywon’t website. The site was orignially founded early this summer to put my schools underground newspaper online and save me the trouble of spreading it around campus the traditional way. I bought a 100mb spot on my host server (I did this because I wanted to also host more pages with other themes as time went on) and started work on the scripting. Many of my friends at school play UO, and a lot of them asked to move into some of the empty space on the server. I figured what the hell, I have a lot of it (free space) and I know these guy personally, so i did it.

When I first heard from my buddy, who will remained un-named for his own good, that he wanted to make a Lady Moi fan site, I cringed. It sounded like a terrible idea; but he really wanted to try out his new HTML skills so I let him. I admit, the site is cheesy in worst way. It sounds like a 15 year old infatuated with someone he never even met before, but that’s not the case. In his defense, I have to stress that he is trying to be funny and informative, but failing miserably.

To the point: I happen to read your site every day, along with the WTFmen and (ok ok i admit it) Dr. Twister. You are very entertaining and I keep on coming back to hear what you have to say. What do you recommend he do to change the site? I am not gonna take it down because I did promise it to him and a promise is a promise no matter how many flames he and I might get. Besides, the little shit actually talks to Lady Moi about three times a day. By “talks” I mean that she writes back answering all his fucking questions and they get along. That’s more than my Wal*Mart UO site ever got, so I guess it has some potential. I am very curious about your thoughts on this matter. Please be gentle if your just gonna post this and mock me, although that would be funny too. Thanks for listening.

My thoughts? The site itself seems harmless enough and actually basically tells people to get a clue and not stalk the poor woman, but I think the hysteria that is springing up around LadyMOI is a serious sign that everyone needs to get up, turn off the computer, and go meet an actual woman. Once again, here is Uma Thurman to demonstrate what an actual woman looks like.

I recommend you print this out, go to a bar, church or other place where women occasionally gather, and hold the printout up by her head, so you can contrast her head and Uma’s head, side by side. If they have enough matching characteristics, congratulations! You’ve found an actual woman! By the way, that tingling sensation in your crotch is because she just kicked you there. It hurts less if you bend over.

(By the way, I’m entitled to mock this hysteria, since I basically started it. Nyah.)

THE HOUSE IS THE KEY

Another correspondent on the slickazoid smurf on LS writes:

Well I can give you a second opinion on all this Slade thing. Ya see I’m the guy in red next to the pack horse. I was basically practicing stealing on the pack horse named “you”. Loads of fun watching the newbies call guards and threatening to call gms cause I don’t flag, while waiting to see my skill raise. Anyhow this guy Slade wasn’t a counselor cause this moron was yelling guards and was trying to sell his spiffy blue shield. I talk to him a bit basically telling him I wasn’t going to stop stealing his bag (which I was stealing from the horse called you remember :P).But he was right, this counselor Stark was a show. He wasn’t typing full sentences just typing abbreviations and word enter word enter word enter, you get the idea. He even told a guy how to trap chests without getting flagged a criminal. (for those that don’t know you trap the chest on the ground of your house. to quote Stark “The house is the key”.)

IF I JOIN GAMEHUT, DO I GET A GAGGLE OF HENCHMEN TOO?

A couple people thought I was actually taking Gamehut’s offer of hosting this site seriously. One concerned ex-Gamehut site webmaster wrote:

Gamehut is ran by an immature sixteen year old kid who goes by the name of Fool, a name that fits him. He makes money off the sites, which isn’t a bad thing but it comes with consequences. Fool forces upon you a small, yet noticeable, amount of censorship. Bad mouth Dr. Twister, his money maker, he will tell you to remove it, if you do not he will remove it himself. Posting a link to R33T.ORG would suffer the same fate because they host the Anti Twister site. You will have to belive in everthing Fool belives in or take that off your site. I highly enjoy your site and moving to Lamehut would be a bad move IMO. Thank you for your time.

Kind of ironic, considering Fool’s moneymaker just posted a bitch about there’s no free speech in UO. Speaking of Fool’s moneymaker, the speculations on his actual secret identity continue to grow. This person writes:

Lum, first I urge you not to openly mock me and such, as in my current emotional state I could walk to the top of a bell tower… and, well, you get it.

Anyways, if you go to https://www.wtfman.com/mcd/september.htm and scroll down to the date 9/08/99 you will see something about new members, Vader and Shaitan. Now we all now Shaitan is TwisTy’s pet, and if you recall a few months ago, people were saying Tw. Drister was Vader….and GM Darwin said as much in your interview with him… and… well… since the entire WTFman crew prolly knows Dr T….. you get where I’m going? The guild (/m\ on Baja, the Malagents, was Ron’s guild) probably had Twister in it, thus furthering the proof that Twister is a person that would actually name their character after a well known Star Wars character. But don’t quote me on this.

OK, I won’t quote you on it, I’ll just post your entire email verbatim. As for the Ronald McDonald – Twister connection, it’s possible, although I see him as more a Nighthawk henchman myself. I mean, Ron is too funny for Twister, and I’m not saying that just because he’s shamelessly ganking my mojo.

BEFORE THIS GOES ANY FURTHER, WE REALLY SHOULD EXPLAIN TO THAT GUY IN HIS MOM’S BASEMENT DROOLING ON HIMSELF WHAT “INTERACTING WITH THE COMMUNITY” MEANS AND DOES NOT MEAN

The UO community’s infatuation with LadyMOI continues unabated. Essentially as one, the active UO community (consisting of 1,274 oversexed male adolescents, 182 middle aged males who still live in Mom’s basement, 390 teenage males who pretend to be women so that they can get free stuff, 2 actual women who pretend to be men because they are terrified of the consequences otherwise, and Sorsha the Amazing UO Cyberwhore) has begun, as one, to have a small fleck of drool slowly run down their chin.

Crossroads of Britannia, which unlike this web site you’re reading now actually does real journalism from time to time, actually asked LadyMOI what she thought of all this hoofrah. Here’s what she said;

I think the whole situation is hysterically funny and I am glad everyone is having a good time. My job is all about interacting with the community and if this helps to serve that purpose, then all right! A really cool side effect is that more people will hear about Origin’s Online Community Relations and about my and Calandryll’s work. This is good because the more people that know about us and what we do… the more we can do for those people. Huzzah! Everyone wins!

Calandryll, The Other Guy No One Pays Attention To Who Actually Answers UO Questions, when asked about this hoohah, said “No one pays attention to me! I can be a sex symbol, too! Really! Picture me in Speedos!”*

* Note: Calandryll did not actually say this.**
** but he COULD have.

TRUST NO ONE

The picture of the irritable smurf sent in yesterday elicited some comment, as well as some healthy skepticism from this guy:

Come on Lum, who knows what the smurf said. People make up stories all the time to get attention or just to be malicious.

What the smurf really could have said

Asha’man

Then again, we have this report:

If I’m not mistaken, Slade would be one of the original counselors coming from the era of post-bassanio pre-ironwill reign of terror on the C program. I should know, I was part of it 🙂 If Slade of LS is indeed the counselor Slade i’m thinking of, it would

1) Make quite a bit of sense (Slade was one of those guys that would draw crowds of people around him going “ur mufh betr than gms”)

2) Cause me to belive he either got kicked or quit the counselor program (I quit due to creative differences to my SRC… we didn’t get along. That and the whole thing was and still is a joke)

I, for one, completely agree with your views on the volunteer program. In my time, the SRC’s would hire twice as many counselors as they needed, because they knew that either they would quit because it wasn’t as r33t as they thought, or because they exploited every possible loophole in the system. And the age limit is pretty much a joke also. I knew counselors that were decent fellows that would of gotten hit by that rule. I was under 25 also, yet I was a C for almost a year. I seriously doubt that system will ever work like its intended to.

On a side note, there certainly are more idiots in the C program then before… maybe they should have a requirement for you to write a 200 word essay on your life in UO or why you want to help the UO community. That’ll kill about 90% dewds.

A former Counselor. I’d prefer to stay anon (Kyra would have my head)