On Statuary

Jackson Lays the Cornerstone for Jackson Statue (1840) – New Orleans  Architecture Tours

I know people are going to disagree with me no matter how I weigh in, so welp. I draw a very, VERY thick line between statues of Presidents like Andrew Jackson (which currently protesters are trying to topple) and the Confederate statues everywhere. There’s a reason for this. Buckle up, here comes the history.

In the aftermath of Reconstruction, aka “maybe we should give a significant minority of recently enslaved citizens representation in our government”, the ex-Confederates fought back, both politically (the story of presidential elections in the latter 19th century was essentially Democrat-easy on the South vs Republican-hard on the South) and literally (this is how the KKK and other such white supremacist militias were born). And sadly, they won. Southern landowners established racial superiority through other means than slavery, and it remained for over a century (in many ways, it continues).

In the 20th century, when it was looked down on for KKK night riders to lynch Black citizens en masse, the followers of the Confederate/Jim Crow ideology spread it via other means. Specifically, statuary. This is why almost every Southern city has a statue of some Confederate general – the “Daughters of the Confederacy” (I guess racism is more acceptable if women did it, back then) funded them all. (This is also why so many military bases are named after Confederate generals. Curiously, after World War 2 we didn’t create a Ft. Rommel or an Air Force Base Yamamoto. Funny how that works.) It’s why in Georgia there’s a mural blasted out of a mountain that is more totalitarian in effect than anything the Communist bloc ever came up with. Confederate statues were the literal act of white racists lifting their legs and peeing on the commons.

So yes, tear down the artifact of that era – no Confederate general deserves commemoration. And if you want to argue for the myth-making of Lee or Stonewall Jackson – try to find statues of Rommel or Guderian in Germany. Both were extremely effective, by all accounts honorable, and Rommel was eventually killed by Hitler for not being a good Nazi. Still no statues. Because the Nazi era, as the Confederate era, does not deserve to be commemorated.

Recently this has spread to “anyone in history who’s owned slaves” (including memorably, Gen. Ulysses Grant who, when gifted with a slave, freed him as quickly as humanly possible and, oh, by the way, led the reunification of America and the liberation of every slave in the Confederacy). Every historical figure can be argued – Christopher Columbus was a genocidal madman, Andrew Jackson was a war criminal, the list goes on. No one survives historical study.

I would simply ask to draw a line between the political act of the neo-Confederate white-washing of a slaveholder’s revolt, and historical commemoration in general. It’s a discussion that is worth having, but not drawing that line leads inexorably to a Year Zero where nothing is worthy of commemoration.

This link gives further illustration and is recommended reading.


Little in the way of updates the past couple of days (well, none really, if you want to be technical about it). I’ve heard some rumors fly past on housing changes that involve purging the hordes of items within them  that you little pinheads seem hellbent on keeping.  The guy who does UORobot put up a webcam of his robot running; he was then promptly busted for macroing. This may of course be just a coincidence. UORobot always struck me as a bit too mad scientist for me. I do like to still maintain the illusion that I actually have something to do with how my character behaves in UO.

Speaking of which, in the whether or not Lum is allowed to play UO yet department, I logged on yesterday and everything was fine until a gargoyle showed up. Apparently the thought of actual combat taking place scared my poor little client, so it immediately Connection Losted, whereupon I immediately Died. This did not enhance my overall UO experience. So it’s time for another 80’s moment (and stop bitching about Vanilla Ice, I don’t care if his hit was in 1990, he’s still 80’s to me. What I want to know is why the hell you people know when Ice Ice Baby came out. I don’t.)


Frankie Say Fix Ultima Online Now.

I know this will come as a shock to everyone but I’m told some of the members of Frankie were gay. Not only that, “Relax” wasn’t about laser beams. The band eventually broke up and the lead singer contracted AIDS, which probably means they were a bit too relaxed.


Thunderlips, the Ultimate eBay Seller, sends this:

I loved that armor I found 🙂 While in the town of Skara Brea playing my Bard songs, the citizens would walk up to  me and say “Greetings Avatar, Thy plate armor makes ye look most Manly!”. It even instantly promoted my title from “Arch-Druid” to “The Glorious Lord Thunderlips, Grandmaster of Manliness”. Man I love that armor. I was however a big target for PKs in the Proving Grounds of the Mad Overlord. One bastard named Werda ran up to me and said, “Thy armor makes ye look most manly! ~snicker~, I want it! *TILTOWAIT* !!! “. After being light on fire from the thermo-nuclear explosion I attemped to slay him with my wand, The Cane Corpus, but he said the magical words “Kal Ort Por” and disappeared. Just as he faded out, he said “PS: Trebor Sucks!”. I still don’t know what that means…
All in all though, I can live with the PKs with armor like that. Even the Dark elves of Marrowind appreciate the craftsmenship.  Lord Wood himself spoke of my Manliness and send me on a quest to retrieve the 7 peices of the Destiny Wand to defeate the Demi-God “Tarjan”. I did suceed, but the Mega-Dragon teamed up with the Dark Savant and killed my faithful hirelings Iolo and Shamino. Man, I pretty pissed off, but I found a new group of adventured in Thornberry playing a irritaing gambling game called Flip-Flop. After Drittz and Dragonbait joined my quest things seemed much easier… We even slayed the Beast of 1000 eyes in only a slight scuffle.
Later our journeys took us to Phlan and to the the forest know as “The Elder Grove”. Many beasties did we fight! Cuisinarts, Bandi-Phoots, Blast Dragons, Creeping Coins, Brass Dragon-God, Power Liches, Balrons, and even Minons of Malangar. The rewards are trivial compaired my armor however. 49 magic candles? Obsidian Armor? Diamond Swords?  Bah! Junk compaired to my Godly Armor of the Whale! Nothing compairs to that!
Ah, I babble. So is Godly plate going in UO2?


OK, I’ve been patient. I’ve been reasonable. I’ve even been …understanding.

But it’s been over a week now, and I’d like to play UO, please.

Ever since ***THE PATCH***, my connection to UO has been somewhere south of nowhere. Step… step… thirty seconds of lag, followed by “Connection Lost”. Needless to say, this makes it somewhat difficult to play. Especially when others are apparently unaffected by this lag. It’s almost funny, hanging around the Brit crossroads on Siege, watching everyone else’s position via stop-motion photography. Until, of course, I die.

I don’t know what causes this. I have ideas. Apparently part of the wonderous bundle of joy that we call ***THE PATCH*** has introduced more client-server traffic. Um, this is bad, mmmkay? I mean, at some point in coding all those wonderful UOAriffic features into the client, someone should have piped up and said “Uh, guys, not everyone is connected to the servers via a direct Ethernet connection.” 

What’s really peachy about ***THE PATCH*** is that it doesn’t affect everyone. Some folks, mostly on high speed connections, report no problems at all. Some folks report mild irritations and the occasional disconnect.

And some folks – like me – well, let’s just say I’m glad Final Fantasy 8 came out when it did, because otherwise I might have to read a book or go outside or something.

Others blame Globalcenter. Globalcenter is the UO tar baby… when someone’s house is broken into, 9 times out of 10 someone somewhere will blame Globalcenter. Apparently, to use common ISP insider parlance, “they suck, dude”. I don’t know if that’s the problem or not.

I don’t care. I just wanna play. I’ve been REALLY patient… but now I’m pissed. And I’m fighting back, in that special fruity-yet-masculine way that only I can.

That’s right. In a very special episode of net.terrorism, until I can play UO again, every day I will be posting snapshots from everyone’s favorite decade, the Eighties. If I can’t play UO, dammit, I’m going to make you remember the decade when I was able to get drunk and get laid on something approaching a regular basis.


Kick it!

All right STOP
Collaborate and listen
Ice is back with a brand new invention

Vanilla Ice was the ultimate personification of the hardcore rapper. Millions around the world dropped everything to be like him. Word to yo mutha.