WHO GOT DA FUNK? [Author: wirehead]

KillaX sent this to me as some kind of expose against Ironwill’s DFM guild. Personally, I think it shows Ironw^H^H^H^H^HNotorious NPC as being kinda cool. It also shows that DFM (a) knew about 1-hit-killer weapons and (b) disavowed them, at least in this email.

Over a year old, but posted for historical interest.

Date: Thu, 30 Jul 1998 10:06:41 -0700 (PDT)
From: Notorious NPC
Subject: HoS Destruction
To: (removed)
MIME-Version: 1.0
Content-Type: text/plain; charset=us-ascii
X-UIDL: e1cc7834d37f25e626f69f0d4fa14494
Status: R

This will be a night that the HoS will never forget.

The Digital Funk Machine will spearhead the assault against the HoS, as guilds still seem reluctant to come together to fight them. While we all have our petty differences, surely for a few hours we can place them aside to battle what most of us feel the evil of the shard.

DFM guildmembers have had some personal schedule changes which have made it hard to all play together; however this is a night that we will not let pass without taking full advantage.

This is what I need from you:

1) If you are in a guild that is at war with HoS, bring your guildmember. We will need forces to chase them through town. For those that are not at war, bring your character that does not mind having a couple murders.

2) Equip well. If for some reason you die during our battles tonight, it is the rest of our duties to help protect the items and guard the stuff AND NOT TO LOOT. So if you have that magic plate waiting for that special occasion, this is the time. You will fight against those that believe as you do, and I will personally make sure it is not lost.

3) We need runes to places. DFM does not have very many, and we need some to the dungeons, towns for the guilds, and to every known HoS house and hideout. We are putting trust into this, so dont screw over the murderers by sending us to town. đŸ™‚

4) We need a color so that we are all identifiable to each other. For lack of reason, I say wear capes that are the darkest blue possible. This is important; anyone with that color will be treated as friend until otherwise noted.

5) Meet at the Vesper crossroads at midnight CST tonight. If for some reason that location is taken, then we will meet at the second mountain pass that is west of Covetous.

Notify any other guilds that you deem necessary. Unfortuantely the other night we had a run-in with Xanadu that had some trigger-happy members. đŸ™‚ OUR ENEMY IS NOT EACH OTHER FOR ONE NIGHT – IT IS THE HOS.

On the case that HoS has their one hit bows, we will need to run and contact a GM or a Counselor. While they would proclaim otherwise, running from that b.s. is not shameful at all. And if you have a onehitter, do NOT bring it. DFM will not ever partake in that, and do not want to be associated as such.

Here is to the good fight,
Notorious NPC