Acclaim: Being Black Is Awesome!

Proving that the MMO industry is far, far superior to aged shock jocks, Acclaim’s new DANCE! Online dancing-required microtransaction-driven MMO has decreed that being a black person on the dance floor is so totally awesome, you must earn the privilege. Or, as one somewhat surprised user asks,

I GOTTA PAY TO BE BLACK?

to which a “player moderator” replied,

Black is an EXTRA feature. It makes your person look unique, so that is an EXTRA feature. Therefore, you having to PAY for it. (Or ask a friend to pay for it).

Thankfully, before Rev. Al Sharpton was made aware that MMOs exist, an actual Acclaim employee immediately chimed in with

As an optional character upgrade, we must put this in the item shop for players to acquire. This is the only way to offer the African-American heads. However, it should be EASILY accessible to all, so we made it just 1 POINT in the shop (which is basically for FREE). You don’t have to spend any money to get it, just play the game and earn points. Thanks!

DANCE! has multiple currencies, and the 1 point referred to can be earned by, apparently, not being black briefly.

Acclaim should be aware that there is in fact, no parking on the dance floor, as rival dancing-with-the-cyberbits MMO Audition has signed Hillary Duff for something or another.

Interestingly, both Audition and DANCE! strongly complain if you use Firefox instead of Internet Explorer. But if open source doesn’t free your mind, then what?

  • Pander

    So, what you’re saying is that you can buy a black man for 1 point. You’d think inflation would keep up after 144 years…

  • Freakazoid

    Being black is the new uberguild requirement. Their strength and agility bonus is too good to pass up, even though they’re often stopped by town guards for no reason.

  • http://www.damnedvulpine.com/ J.

    nappy.

  • http://hgamer.blogspot.com Heartless_

    Meh…

  • anti-bunny

    If being black is an extra step above being white, every player would take that step, for fear of being seen as a newbie otherwise. Doesn’t matter if the extra step made you black or green or purple, it would be more prestigous.

  • http://ambernight.com Amber

    As a person of pasty color, I am offended by the fact that I am worth 0 points. I’m calling Bill O’Reilly.

  • http://www.thisisnotacommunity.org D-0ne

    Why isn’t the earth a smoldering cinder by now?

  • Mist

    Amber… you got your own link wrong…

  • Signe

    I would pay to be black if it meant I could dance without stepping on my own feet.

  • http://overmoderated.blogspot.com GreyPawn

    It is in deeper trouble than just its racist tenor.

    In-game, there is a built-in marriage system for characters. However, the system intentionally excludes same-sex couples.

    As most industry folks with any smidgeon of design knowledge know, restricting a marriage system to straight couples and excluding gay or lesbian couples is an active design decision. It requires that they actively -decide- to exclude, since a basic system would be naturally inclusive.

    This doth not bode well for Acclaim.

  • scottj

    I wouldn’t lay that entirely on their doorstep. This is actually a port/localization of a Chinese MMO called Super Dance Online.

  • MatW

    Add “installs a rootkit” to the list of offenses.

  • http://www.corpnews.com Andrew Crystall

    Any details, MatW? Or a link?

  • Amp

    Marriage in a video game.

    I’d like to kill the asshat that started that in UO.

  • Freakazoid

    I’ve heard of some strong methods from asian hacker-prevention systems, but installing a rootkit sounds unlikely. I’d also like to know where you heard that.

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  • ChrisA

    Guh. What bonehead web designer thinks that building an IE-only site is a good idea? Especially (nudge Acclaim) when the site does nothing particularly special once you actually get it to?

  • MatW

    Certainly…. gameguard stays running as a background driver at all times, and injects code into all other running processes.

    “High possibility of nProtect Gameguard being a rootkit.”

    http://www.wilderssecurity.com/showthread.php?t=136414

    I’m not a security tin-foil-hatter by any means, but I really would have preferred to be informed about this stuff by Acclaim.

  • Boanerges

    Could have been worse. Acclaim could have said that the black head makes you articulate.

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  • Nicks

    I actually have the beta for Dance! Online.

    The ability to be African American costs 1P.

    Yes, they do have 3 types of currency. P is free and is earned by simply playing. Then there’s the “give us money for it” C and the “random bonus points” B.

    I basically see absolutely no big deal here, seeing as you start the game with like 1500 P. And I’m African American myself. What IS the problem is that there are no African American hairstyles in the game besides dreads. It’s almost like the game was designed with white people in mind and then added black people as an afterthought.

    Maybe I DO have a problem with it…

    Oh, and the game is a DDR knockoff with out-of-sync arrows and so-so songs.

  • =j

    Will spenind the 1P allow me to dance without biting my lower lip? Not that I need that or anything….

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