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Why, yes, this IS why I am in the MMO industry.


Second Life Escort Ratings (NSFW)

It’s not all handcuffs and cream in Cyboria, sadly…

This is all pretty good. But then things went wrong, because the people in charge of Amsterdam are skilled in banning, but not in looking after their facilities. Thus I got exposed to the extremely annoying hassle with animation balls that are completely misplaced. Nude people flying the air. Nude people standing on their heads. The kind of thing people go to the circus for.

Clearly he did not go to the same circuses I did as a child.

Sadly, one of the few things not rated in his conclusive guide: how many of the “escorts” are actually female.

This entry was posted on Monday, February 13th, 2006 and is filed under _. You can follow any responses to this entry through RSS 2.0. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

  1. #1 by Heartless_ on February 13th, 2006

    Lum there is other things than pr0n on the internet.

  2. #2 by Balasarius on February 13th, 2006

    The Internet is for pr0n! Sing along! “Just grab your dick and double-click for porn, porn, porn!” ;)

    Thanks for the link, Lum. Wild stuff.

  3. #3 by Cael on February 13th, 2006

    > Lum there is other things than pr0n on the internet.

    That’s true. Oh hold on, no, they took down bonsaikitten.com so actually it isn’t true.

    All pr0n from here on in. Move along please.

  4. #4 by Kalain on February 13th, 2006

    Yeah, smed and jacobs are going to start giving their press releases naked soon. It’ll be naked news all over again, with more brain bleach.

  5. #5 by ajeba on February 13th, 2006

    4 words … Hot Gay Elf Porn!

  6. #6 by Dom on February 13th, 2006

    When I first read that site last week or so, I wondered the same thing about the gender of the player behind the ‘escort’. I figured that since these things seem to be run more like brothels than streetwalking pimps, their ‘agency’ might actually have some regulations of some kind. Like somehow trying to verify that you are actually female before they let you in. That would at least make these things worth paying in some people’s eyes, because clearly the cybersex itself is no different to any AOL chatroom (or the Darnassus General chat, as the case may increasingly be). I would GUESS that the whole hook of these agencies is that the player is supposed to be verified as female. Although I really have no idea.

  7. #7 by Freakazoid on February 13th, 2006

    You mean it’s cirque du soleil online? Although I didn’t see any mention of a hedgehog with a boner riding a tricycle.

  8. #8 by FNORD on February 13th, 2006

    “Hot Gay Elf Porn!”
    And welcome to our Googling friends!

  9. #9 by Evangolis on February 13th, 2006

    I’m not at all interested in cybersex; I’m just an old fashioned guy who’s content with his aging video collection, but I have to wonder, being reasonably open minded, if, since we are dealing with a relationship which will almost certainly never be consumated in any non-virtual sense, why it matters what sex the person at the other keyboard is? I mean, you’re probably looking at the Vanessa Williams bondage shots on your wall anyhow, so what does it matter?

  10. #10 by serlev on February 14th, 2006

    Jesus fuck. Scott Addams is right. The holodeck will be the downfall of mankind.

  11. #11 by xaldin on February 14th, 2006

    But what a fun downfall…

    It sure beats nuclear war.

  12. #12 by Merkwurdigliebe on February 14th, 2006

    Hi, I was googling \’e2\’80\’9cHot Gay Elf Porn\’e2\’80\’9d and found this site. What’s a MMO? *snickers* By the way, Avenue Q was silly and appeals only to snooty New Yorkers.

  13. #13 by Boanerges on February 15th, 2006

    So basically Second Life = Monty Python’s Flying (Nude) Circus?

    As to why the gender matters on the other end… a large part of why people engage in cybersex is that it’s the ultimate “safe sex”: 100% emotional connection. In the minds of people doing this stuff they like to believe that they’ve made some sort of connection on the other end. I’ve seen enough online drama to fill several books and most often it’s either lonely guy X looking for love or desparate, ignored housewife Y looking for an alternative to absent hubby Z. How would you feel having invested so much emotion into a relationship only to find out it was someone playing with you?

  14. #14 by Lara Arnot on July 22nd, 2006

    The article seems to be down, just want to say I do this kind of work from time to time in SL and I don’t think I will ever join a club. It takes away your freedom and the few I tried to join, none of them cared to verify if I was really a female or not, so I imagine what kind of escorts they have.

    Oh… and what is this about Elf Sex? :)

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  16. #16 by LeKiykok on December 8th, 2007

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