AND NOW FOR SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT [Author: lum]

Here’s an interesting take I was emailed on the Twister story. Certainly something to think about. Sure, it’s fun calling him “St. Twister” or “Hero of the Stupid” but as always, there are people behind those funny looking pixels.

Just thought of something. OSI’s been waiting for Twister to screw up, and now they’re going to bring the Fires of Heaven down upon his head.

Post maps? OK. Post stories? Sure. Those things just spark interest (or kindle hate… I’m one of those “Ultima Purists”). However, he really went too far with posting those internal timelines. That’s a no-no. As Capt. Hook would say, “bad form.”

Why did he do it? I mean, its obvious that OSI knows who he is. If rumors are true, the guy was a Counselor once upon a time (of course, if other rumors are true, he works for OSI, is Lord British, Lady MOI, Designer Dragon, or all of them at the same time). In any case, whether or not they knew his secret identity before, they do now. Lawyers have a way of getting things done. Twister had to have known this. I mean, he isn’t as brain dead as he may seem to some people. So again, why did he do it?

Well, I think that he panicked. Think about it. Here he is, finally getting the respect that he thinks he deserves. All these new multiplayer games are going straight to Twister to spread their gospel, or are at least encouraging him and his cohorts (Atriarch and Shadowbane, for example). As visions of TwisterVault.com dance in his head, he gets this UO2 information.

Yes, I have no doubt that it was real UO2 information. Of course, that doesn’t mean too terribly much. I mean, once upon a time Ultima IX was going to have a dual scale map, a party, and it would fly on a Pentium 100 with 32mb of RAM. So, he posts it. He is very careful in what he posts too. He knows what is dangerous and what isn’t, and stays well inside the safety zone. All is good. On some level, OSI is pleased. They’re getting customer feedback.

However, things went wrong. People mocked and ridiculed Twister. “What,” they said, “do you expect us to believe this line of bull?” Of course, I doubt they said bull, but you get the idea. Twister was crushed. His dreams of credibility were slowly drifting into the gutter. He might have acceptance from the exploiters and the anti-social player killers, but what he really wanted was respect from the average joe – the person who has never seen an animated lava tile on a vendor or a looting ‘shroom. Above all else, Twister just wanted to be loved…

So, in a last ditch effort to prove that he wasn’t lying, Twister published those internal timelines. He knew it was wrong, but he did it anyway. He had to. He rationalized it by editing out some of the juicier parts. Perhaps, he thought, if he left out some of the specifics, OSI would show mercy. That wasn’t his primary concern though. He had to prove to the world that he was a real journalist. He had to prove that he really cared, and was a viable and important part of the UO community. Unfortunately, his plan failed.

Instead of opening their eyes to the possibly outdated but nonetheless authentic bits of UO information, the people laughed as OSI descended on Twister with the Wrath of the Gods. Was it for real? Is it just another joke? I think the general consensus is that he got what was coming to him – not what he wanted, which was just a little bit of love.

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